It's 2025 and the only way we've figured how to fix something as important as eyesight is by balancing glass on our nose, shoving silicon into our eyeballs or firing lasers at our corneas (which to be fair is incredibly metal as hell).

Is a dog dressed in wool, after a fashion, a wolf in sheep's clothing?

If you sing the alphabet in keyboard order (qwerty…) there are two extra notes at the end that no letters fill.

Kinda weird how "I'm up for that" and "I'm down for that" mean the same thing.

2000–2024 was a brief but golden period in history where anyone could get accurate information on most topics with a quick Internet search—after the rise of search engines, but before the rise of AI-created mass disinformation.

If they want to get rid of "less-skilled" workers, instead of getting rid of DEI they should focus on getting rid of nepotism.

Jerry Seinfeld never complained about his neighbor upstairs stomping their feet.

For a song that constantly reminds you that "there's no rules in rock 'n' roll", Rock N Roll Rules got an awful lot to say about what you "gotta" do if you wanna be a rockstar.

Future people are going to talk about us with our micro plastics and bad food pyramid the same way we talk about the romans for using lead piping and lead cups...

When you chew whole peanuts you are making peanut butter in your mouth.

If every female dog is a bitch, every male dog is a son of a bitch.

Argentina is the Florida of South America.

Conspiracy theorists who claim that the conclusions of scientists can be bought, are acknowledging that those scientific opinions have value, while spreading their own theories for nothing because that is all they are worth.

You can pit two audible phone apps against each other in a death duel. Start them both at the same time and see who wrestles the output away from the other, killing them.

Our feet are younger than our heads are due to gravity.

One day there'll be more shower thoughts by AI than by humans.

A compressed spring is heavier than when it is uncompressed.

In a thousand, civilization might interpret modern slang as Shakespeare

If one or both conjoned twins have schizophrenia then it would be far less noticeable as it's normal for them to talk as two in one body.

Gangs are multi-level marketing schemes.